Max today has bee ok so far. The doctors appointment went well. We start medications next monday I think. It gives me something positive to focus on. The range sucked, I was soaking wet and muddy. BUT because of it I would have to go home and change clothes and then go back to work for Car seats. Well again my luck worked out and I was able to find coverage. The thing was I had mentally prepared. BUT baby I am completely ok with not doing them, do I think Im ready. NOPE, so it worked out ok. Max today sucks but in it there has been positives. The appointment went ok, I got to not do car seats again, and Max your daddy went on the computer to look something up and saw a really cool frog. On Bing.com today there is a frog climbing a tree. He is really cool. At first I was not as excited because it was a frong not a toad. So we looked up if frogs and toads are the same. It turns out they are, for the most part. They are of the same class and order. There are differences but there is more that is the same. Max I asked for you today. I really needed you. I dont know if you listen or if you can even hear me. (I hope you can) But Max baby I'll take that. It really helped my mood a lot. Your dad told me he was sad all day today. Max I feel the best right now. I dont care that I suck at life and at work. I dont care about anything right now. I feel like maybe you heard me. Like maybe your with me and your daddy. Max Im home a lot earlier then I planned because of not doing car seats. I need to go to the drug store and then maybe I will go to the gym. I actually feel upbeat and I have you for that. Max thanks for listening to me today. I asked for you in my head a lot. Missing you is so hard.
I hope I can stay this ok.
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