Today is 8 weeks baby boy. 8 weeks is 2 whole months. Hey my little love I am so tired today. I feel like a horrible person for wanting some people to back off. Why do I get so angry. Or is it that I tolerate everything until I cant take it anymore. I just dont want to hurt there feelings. You would think when things are hard you would want family around I guess thats another thing that makes me so different. I want normalcy from family. If I want something I will ask. I know I cant have things both ways. Sometimes I need someone to ask me how im doing, or is ok with me talking about you max, and when I was pregnant. But other times with certain people I just want things the same. Sometimes I get so annoyed with family telling me how sad they are. If I have to continue with my life, so do they. I need to be sad on my own sometimes. There is no need breeding the sadness. Why am I so complicated baby. I know im going to hurt peoples feelings. I dont want to make anyone angy or sad. I just want things normal again for all thats around me.
I know Im different now, I feel different. I feel like there is a big X on me that I can get off.
I need to get it together little man.
Max 2 months (8 weeks) day 56.
56 days since the best day and the worst day of my life. Its crazy how fast life can change. Time is supposed to be a healer, well Im impatient. Time seems to stop and get stuck.
Im sorry for the way I am. I need to start being more positive, eat better, and think ahead. I need to be better, nicer, and healthier.
No comments:
Post a Comment