bad day...

well baby boy, I made it home but still feeling really low. When I got to my car I started to cry, balling really. The whole way home was like that. I feel so apathetic, just lifeless really. I just am missing you so much. I dont know how I was able to keep it together today.   I felt like I barely did. I felt like if anyone spoke to me I was going to break. Max im still having a hard time keeping it together. Why am I like this. why cant I be ok. I need to find some strength. I need to get it together. But how do I find strength and how do I get it together.