Good morning baby boy, So far ok. I had this dream last night about a toad. In the beginning, all I remember was the Toad he had jumped. it was a huge jump and he went over a ledge and down the stairs. I was so worried, but then I remember having to get away and walking through a town on a sidewalk. I'm not sure where he came from but I had this big toad, and I had to run away from something and somehow I ended up at the house I grew up in, in Malvern. My mom was there cooking and growing onions in the back yard. In my yard (I lived on a steep hill) there seemed to be people, not sure who harvesting the grass (strange I know). My yard and house looked the same. My old dog "puppy" was there, I even entered the house through the side door, the one we always entered in. When I got inside on the kitchen table (that looked the same), there was a medium fish tank. I put the toad in there gave him water; I gave him to much so I remember having to drain the water out. (They don't like to be under, they just like to sit in it) I gave the toad a rock; I went outside to get grass and bugs.. The only grass I could seem to find was onion grass. For some reason in the dream I thought onion grass was toxic to the toad. So I was searching and searching for regular grass. I remember smelling the grass to make sure it was normal grass. I put the grass and bugs in the tank. The toad was big, and warty. I really liked him. He tried to jump out of the cage and I did not want him to get hurt so I put a screen on top. The last thing in the dream I remember was me going out to look for another stone for the toad to climb on.
Max this is the first dream I have had where it was something that made me think you somehow are around. I have dreams that make me think of other people's lost loves. I have dreams that center around you a lot, but all of you dying and being dead and morning you. I wish (there I go wishing again) I could see you. I know that dreams are your mind just making things up, but I sure hope this dream was for a reason. I woke up thinking that, that toad was so detailed and vivid. I could describe to you what he looked like. He was mostly brown with shades of dark green; he had lots of warts and dark brown spots, like an old man who has been in the sun all his life. This perfect fat, stout body. Short legs and distinct hands and feet (I don't know what you would call a toad's hands and feet) he had long nails to grip. He had big beady eyes and would stare at me. In my dream I loved this toad, I loved him so much. Max I love you so much.
I have thought about getting a toad, but they don't belong inside my house in a cage. That would be selfish of me. They belong outside doing what toads do. Plus if he died I don't think I could bare it much. I would most likely be the cause for taking him out of his environment. I am very grateful to the dream last night, and just have to wait until spring time to maybe be lucky enough for you to send them around. Max baby I love you so much. I miss you and long for you. I hope that somehow the toad in my dream had something to do with you. I hope it was something other then my brain firing in all ways, and just making things up. I wonder what everything in the dream meant.
Well my little love, I have talked (written) enough. I love you.
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