Productive Monday!

Max I forgot to tell you, I found my tiny rubber toad. I was cleaning out my car and there he was. I thought I lost him (I tend to lose lots of things)
Today was pretty productive, I cleaned the kitchen (sort of ) I re-organized by throwing 2huge trash bags of stuff we don't need or use. I hung up a shelf, I put plastic up on the kitchen windows because it's so cold, I YES actually made dinner, a real one. I made organic whole wheat spaghetti, with organic sauce and the good for you ground turkey. After completely reorganizing the kitchen it motivated me to cook, it was nothing fancy, but MAX I made a real dinner.

I also started in your picture book. I made six pages. Its a lot of work actually and I get distracted or bored easily (even though I enjoy it) so I decided to stop for the night. I put a lot of work into it. I wish so much that you could see it. I wish it was a book to grow with you, not the end of you. Even so I love making things for you. It also helps me. Max you dad told me he was sad, and that he has been sad. He said he has been on the edge of crying. I told him that's ok! He said no, because he is afraid of not getting back to ok , if he breaks down. Your poor daddy, he is my everything and I wish I could do that for him. Sometimes I forget how hard this is for him also. Your dad was very upset that the embryos did not take either. I saw your daddy staring at the pictures as I was arranging them. I know the pictures make him sad where as me they make me happy. I still don't have frames for the big ones, but I don't want to put them up if they will make him sadder.

Max I got my period today. You would think I would be sad because it means there is i life in m stomach. Well I'm not because after this we can try naturally. Max your dad and I talked, we are going to wait about six months until we do our last embryo transfer. We don't have the money and he wants to make sure my body is ready. This way I don't blame it on that. We are still going to try naturally in between. The only concern is my body tends to not make enough progesterone to maintain the pregnancy. So when we go out follow up appointment your dad is going to ask about them helping us track exact ovulation and then progesterone supplements. But it would have to be right away or else it won't help.

Max I'm picking through a box of chocolates right now, so much for my healthy dinner. I really miss you. Overall I had a really productive day. Max having good days are nice. I did have a moment though. While out I felt overwhelmed, but it was ok.
It's ok.......

Well tomorrow I go back to work extra early, it's my month to open again. I hope it's not weird. I really want work to just be work!
I love you baby boy!