Hi beautiful boy. Today was ok, I'm still super paranoid but dealing! Work today was ok except for a mid-day emotional surprise. I did not pack lunch so I went to a place in town to buy something healthy. I'm waiting in line and I see this VERY pregnant lady, I know her. We worked camp cadet together. In my head I was like please don't notice me!! Over and over. I know she is aware of what happened and I did not want to look at her ace or see her perfect 38 week belly ( I know because of Facebook) well she did as anything but the other guy she was with, another state trooper that I worked with said "hey Cpl.Campos" damn I guess my pretending I was invisible did not work. At least he is not pregnant! Thankfully he asked me generic question, asked me how work is and if I plan on coming back to camp cadet. It was ok, but I could not look at the girl. I hope she does not think I was being rude. I hope she understands, she is very aware of what happened. Max baby is it mean of that I wanted to tell her not to get excited, that she might not be taking her little girl home. Those are the thoughts now, when someone is super pregnant. Thank goodness, not everyone knows this feeling. I just wish I was innocent in my thinking.

Max I love you. I hope i get to keep this sibling for you. I'm so worried. Of course your daddy, Beanz and I were throwing the lacrosse ball ( one of my favorite stress relievers) and Beanz got in the way and the ball hot me in my belly. It stung pretty bad. So of course I'm very worried that I hurt your sibling. Your dad was to, but he assured me that right now the uterus is below the pelvic bone. I was hit above.

Tomorrow is friday! I have 7 more days until I can make sure your sibling is still alive. I hope your not mad at me for having another baby in my belly. I hope not. I hope I get to have you as my own personal guardian angel.
I really love you baby boy. Today I was calmer and I appreciate it.