ahhh

Hi Max. We got some more donations tonight in your name. I hope I can get this to be as great as possible. It really is keeping me together. But your daddy is having a really hard night. He is having a hard weekend I think.  I wish I could ask you to watch over him and I know it works. DO you have some control over those things.  I have no idea how to help him most nights. On top of being sad and stressed, he is just depressed. I dont know how much more he can handle emotionally. Max you have an amazing daddy. I wish he knew how amazing he is and how much I need him.

Max, not only did my Aunt just die recently and that was pretty hard.(nothing even close though to this continued struggle with missing you) Well, now my grandmother is dying. My mom sent me a message stating that she has to go back to Maine, because  there is nothing the doctors can do for her. Am I an awful person because Im not that sad. Im more sad for my mother. More hurt for her. Im glad she is getting closure, but im not sad. I have great memory's with her, but mostly hurt ones. The way she treated us after everything came out with our family. The way she chose sides. The way she treated my mother. The way I was never good enough, my sisters were pretter, everyone was better, Im sad, but im not broken over it. I made my piece a long time ago in order to heal my life for all the mest up things on that side of the family. My aunt that just died was, the only one on that side of the family that I felt like she cared about us. Im sorry if this makes me a bad person baby boy.

Please if you can watch over your daddy. I need and love him. Send some healing love to my Casey and all those that need it. I will be ok, those people need it more.

I love you!