Hot and bothered

Hello baby boy. Today I did hardly anything. I slept for the middle part of the day. I was just so tired. I did buy a new coffee table and put it together today. That was a little challenging. Max I think you are amazing and that people who never met you are also effected by toads. When they see them they think  of you. I love that you are able to connect people.

Max im back to struggling with being pregnant again. Im having so much guilt about having to share your room. I was wondering today if, IF this baby stays alive will I not treat them well because im will always be missing you. Will I be sad every time this one has a first. I was think about Christmas and if I will decorate next year (I did not this year) I started feeling bad that i would even consider decorating. BUT then how is that far to your sibling. WHy is my mind even messing with me with this stuff. I was real worried today about your sibling, I was so hot, tired, and cranky I was convinced this baby died. But when I listened to the heart beat there it was, loud and perfect.

Your dad is feeling sick , and he is a big big brat when he is sick. I know I should not be frustrated with him. Maybe its just the mood Im in. But he thinks he has every rare disease just because he does not feel well! Thank goodness he is not sick often.

Max I was missing you a lot today. The new coffee table has a bottom shelf. I was able to put the photo album I made, with all of you NILMDTS photos. I like that your pictures can be on the coffee table for every one to see.

Max Im real hot and bothered today. I was not this way with you.

I miss and love you.