First baby boy I want to. thank you for showing up tonight in toad form. I have not seen one in a while, so it made me very happy.
Your daddy and I went and cashed in your toad bank, ever since I got it we planed that it was going to go to a charity of our choice on your birthday. A while ago I decided it was going to go to case-face and her type of breast cancer research. Well we cashed it in today and it was 100.83 dollars. Your daddy and I doubled it to make it 200 even. We were just going to give it to the research fund. BUT they are also doing a fundraiser right now where you buy a calender page and a chance to win a prize each day. Your daddy decided to buy 20 people 2 chances. Which equals the 200 dollars. SO because of you hopefully we will make 20 people happy with a chance of winning and at the same time giving the $200 to Casey's research. Max hopefully through out life your memory will continue to help and make people smile. You are my everything.
Max we have so many donations. I cant wait to show you it all tomorrow.
Max is it ok, that I am a litte sad that the two babies born while I was in the hospital with you are turning one today. Not sad there turning one, im happy for that. Just sad that I dont get to have that with you. As much as your daddy and I have done for your memory. I would much rather not have, I would rather you be here.
Tomorrow morning I need to go pick up your cake, then come home so your dad and I can pack the truck up with all the donations. I then want to spend time alone with your dad by your tree, and celebrate. Eat your cake, give you your bench and send your balloons off to heaven, After all that we are going to go meet the little boy we bought birthday presents for and give all the donations we have revived.
I need the strength to get through tomorrow. Right this very moment I am ok. BUT I keep thinking about this time last year, this date I was playing games in my hospital room, haveing fun. expecting that soon the next day I would meet you and have you in my arms forever. I was so happy and having the best day ever. I wish I could go back to that happiness. I wish I could go back to being huge and pregnant. My emotions are coming in right now. But its ok.
I hate tonight, because it means tomorrow is the day you were born and died. I need to focus on all the good we are doing in you honor . It still does not take the sadness away.
I love you. I miss you. Im thinking of you. I need you still baby boy.
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| Thank you for the Toad tonight. |
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| The $200 dollars in chances for people to win prizes while raising money for Casey's Cancer research from your bank! |
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