And after the storm.......

Max as the day went on I still had a hard time, I had a breakdown at the doctors. I told him to take your sister out tomorrow, he said NO! (for valid reasons) but I could not stop crying! I cried all the way home and then thankfully your daddy is amazing (and a friend) Im ok right now, just really missing you. Im really tired and really sad missing you. But I also went on a long walk and listened to this song over and over. It makes me cry and sad but also makes me hopefully. I love you and you mean a lot to me. Im trying love. 

And after the storm,
I run and run as the rains come
And I look up, I look up,
on my knees and out of luck,
I look up.

Night has always pushed up day
You must know life to see decay
But I won't rot, I won't rot
Not this mind and not this heart,
I won't rot.

And I took you by the hand
And we stood tall,
And remembered our own land,
What we lived for.

And there will come a time,
you'll see, with no more tears.
And love will not break your heart,
but dismiss your fears.
Get over your hill and see
what you find there,
With grace in your heart
and flowers in your hair.

And now I cling to what I knew
I saw exactly what was true
But oh no more.
That's why I hold,
That's why I hold with all I have.
That's why I hold.

And I will die alone
and be left there.
Well I guess I'll just go home,
Oh God knows where.
because death is just so full
and man so small.
Well I'm scared of what's behind
and what's before.

And there will come a time,
you'll see, with no more tears.
And love will not break your heart,
but dismiss your fears.
Get over your hill and see
what you find there,
With grace in your heart
and flowers in your hair.

And there will come a time,
you'll see, with no more tears.
And love will not break your heart,
but dismiss your fears.
Get over your hill and see
what you find there,
With grace in your heart
and flowers in your hair
(Mumford and sons)