Max baby Today was a really hard day. I was super emotional AGAIN. We finally put up shelves in your room. I have been having a really hard time with struggling wethere to prepare for your sister or not. Either way there are some things i have to do. Because its a c-section I won't be able to move around that much after, so I have been trying to make the room ready. It's so much harder then I ever thought it would be. But we put up selves. We moved your things from the changing table and dresser to the shelves. When was done I just sat on the floor and cried for you. Then I found the baby book that should have all your details, it. It broke my heart all over that it will remain empty I will never know about you. I told your daddy that when I was setting the room up for you, I knew what to do, I had an organized plan. With your sister I have no idea. But for now the shelves are up. I changed the sheet in the crib, I changed the cover on the changin pad, and I put a girl rug on the floor. The sheet and changing pad were yours, it was just to hard to think about putting her on the ones that were prepared for you. We are keeping everything the same, just incorporating girl. Its to her room, it "their" room. Which means both of you.
Max my sadness and fear is so overwhelming. My sadness of being reminded of everything I have missed and will me. And the fear of the same result with your sister.
I love you.
No comments:
Post a Comment